


Strange Fits of Passion Have I Known

by romangold



Category: Septiplier - Fandom, Video Blogging RPF, jacksepticeye, markiplier - Fandom
Genre: Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-05
Updated: 2015-08-05
Packaged: 2018-04-13 04:22:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4507602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/romangold/pseuds/romangold
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“You fainted…straight into my arms. You know, if you wanted my attention you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Strange Fits of Passion Have I Known

Jack had been sure that if he had stayed with Mark, he would always be fine. The secure feeling everyone was always ragging on about when they were with the person they loved was what Jack had been hoping for when he agreed to go in the first place. Of course, he couldn’t use that as an excuse, because, well, he hadn’t actually told Mark that he felt that way. Or anyone, for that matter.

So, his excuse for later? “It sounded like fun.”

Jack didn’t mind that Bob and Wade had come with for the little tour. He loved spending time with them as much as he did with Mark, and anything they did, the Irishman was included, no matter what. It made up for the fact that he would always have unrequited feelings for Mark by giving him everlasting and loyal new friends.

Still, it hurt. It hurt to be near the perfect man and not be able to entwine their fingers or simply wrap an arm around him just because. Jack wanted to be able to press a kiss to Mark’s forehead without having to think of the consequences, and stand shoulder-to-shoulder with him, and rest his head on his shoulder. 

Jack longed for a closeness not only physical, but one that would always put his mind at ease, would make him feel safe and warm even when he wasn’t. All the shit that people in relationships were always bragging about. That was what Jack wanted.

But he only wanted it with Mark.

Jack had a gauge on how bad his crush was. Well, he thought he did, anyway. He couldn’t tell if it was worse when he was near Mark or when they were separated by an ocean. At the moment, however, he and Mark were stuck standing next to each other in an elevator, Wade and Bob pushed together behind them as they waited to arrive at the top of the famous Seattle Space Needle.

“Jack, you’re awfully quiet,” Bob noticed, sending the Irishman spiraling out of his pining stupor. The addressed man blinked and turned, sweeping his gaze over all three Americans evenly, and not just the one standing next to him. “Oh, sorry,” he laughed. “I just zoned out. I was thinking about…”

Well, now they were all staring at him. Jack looked down at his shoes. “I was just thinking about all the traveling I’ve been doing, just to meet with fans.” He smiled, teeth showing. Then he laughed, bringing his head up and hiding his grin with his hand. “It’s insane. It’s really amazing!”

Mark smiled, too. “Well we’re really glad you’re here. It’s always fun with more people!”

Jack found himself beaming like an idiot at his crush until the elevator hit the top floor, and the four had to shuffle out. Despite what Jack would have thought, the observation deck of the tower was not too crowded. The four friends had a whole large space for themselves where Seattle was illuminated out of the window just for them.

Only when Mark, Bob, and Wade stepped up to the window did Jack realize that this might not have been such a great idea.

Spending time with his friends, spending time with his crush, and getting a view of Seattle all at once was what had been on Jack’s mind when he had agreed to come with the three to the tourist attraction. Of course, Jack had thought about just how high up they would be. He had simply disregarded the thought, reminding himself that he’d be with Mark; it would be fine. Now, though, he could feel his legs beginning to quake just from peering out the long window at his place in front of the elevator.

“Jack!” Mark called, and the Irishman jolted, locking eyes with him. “Jack, you gotta come here and check out this view, it’s really amazing!”

Jack could practically feel himself pale at the insistence. “Oh, uh, yeah! Sorry, hold on!” He pulled out his phone to distract himself, and to give himself a temporary out as he told himself how this would have to play out.

First and foremost, Jack didn’t want the other three to know that he was deathly terrified of heights. He had no problem with people knowing in general; he had often acknowledged it in his videos with ease and acceptance, and no one had a problem with it. However, he wanted nothing more than to keep it from showing now, when he had come all the way up to the observation deck of the Seattle Space Needle with his three friends. The most embarrassing thing Jack could think of at this moment was freaking out in front of Mark, Bob, and Wade. And mostly Mark.

Second, Mark was there. And Jack was not about to freak out in front of his crush. So, he put his phone back in his pocket and walked up to the large window beside the man. He wasn’t sure if looking straight ahead at the city skyline or down into the streets was worse, so he moved his eyes around each and every way in order not to focus on one thing.

The metal bar in front of the window had become Jack’s source of strength, and he gripped it as if it was keeping him from the chilly hands of death itself. He saw Mark’s hands, also on the bar, though they were simply resting and not gripping them in needless fright. Berating himself as he did it, the Irishman slid his right hand over so it was less than a centimeter away from Mark’s.

Mark didn’t notice. Jack didn’t expect him to. Actually, he was glad that he hadn’t, because he could feel his own legs becoming less meat and bone and more jelly with each moment that passed as the four gazed out on the wide view.

“This is what I love about traveling,” Mark said, voice soft. “Seeing other cities, and how they’re all beautiful in their own ways. Just…” He shrugged then, as if to finish with ‘no big deal’. Jack saw Bob and Wade smiling, nodding, out of the corner of his eye, but was too busy keeping his eyes busy on not looking down or anywhere else to do the same.

It took another whole minute of the nice silence between them on the mostly-empty observation deck for anyone to say something else, and for it to be directed at the foreigner.

“Jack,” he heard Mark address, and he took the opportunity to look at him and not the horrible view. “Jack, why- why are you gripping the bar so tight?” The question was intermixed with chuckles, and the Irishman knew that he must look pretty silly to be holding something with such a strong grip when he was standing inside behind a window.

He looked down at his hands and laughed, too, and damn, it sounded nervous. Damn. “I’m not holding it that tight, Mark,” he lied, turning his gaze back to the American and off of his white knuckles.

Too late. Mark wasn’t laughing anymore. “Hey, are you alright?” he asked Jack, lowering his voice. His eyes weren’t as dreamy as they had been just a second ago. Jack hated himself for taking that out of him.

“Of course I am,” he assured, and tried to smile; he could only manage a smirk. That couldn’t look too normal, but it was all he had. Jack glanced around and saw that Wade and Bob had their eyes on him and Mark.

Mark pursed his lips before he nodded, most likely assuming that his friend would tell him if something was wrong. Jack felt something pull on his gut at that thought, but he couldn’t help it. They didn’t understand. He couldn’t ruin this.

“Well, Mr. Shamrock Shake,” Mark joked,“how do you feel about Seattle?” He made a sweeping gesture over the window with his arm, and Jack settled his eyes on that for a moment. He started to answer when Bob and Wade also had their eyes on him. “Well, it’s…" 

The youngest man forced himself to look out over the long stretch of the city, and the lights on the buildings in the night, and the streets so far below, really far below, and how tall was the building they were in because wow they were so high up, and it was so far down, and Jack was looking down, now, and it really was a tall building-

Jack felt his legs shake and his arms stiffen, and a swooping sensation flipped around his stomach as he stared down at the height between him and the sidewalk. Jack heard himself moan,“Oh, no. Oh, my God.” Jack felt a hand on his shoulder. Jack heard Wade say something.

Jack’s legs gave out. He fell into someone. Then he fell into a murky black swamp. He dreamt of nothing.

* * *

Jack didn’t open his eyes right away when he came to. He was resting more or less upright, wrapped in something gentle, something warm, something that cradled him as if he were very precious and nothing less.

Arms. Not something. Someone. The Irishman heard voices surrounding him, familiar, quick, nervous. Bob. Muttering. Loudly. Something about videos. And Wade, humming something back. Words.

Mark’s voice, then. Very close to Jack. He was saying that he wanted to be alone. Jack wondered where he was. He scowled at the effort it took him to rouse himself, blinking rapidly at the sudden light that burned his eyes. He heard the shuffling of feet. And when he adjusted to the lighting of the room, Jack found himself gazing up at Mark.

The mood shifted when the Irishman realized that he was being supported in Mark’s arms, and that they were alone. He racked his disconcerted brain for something cute or suave to say.

“…What?” was what Jack croaked up at the American, face pulled into a grimace.

“Do you feel OK?” Mark inquired, wording everything slowly. “Are you injured?”

“I feel like shite,” Jack answered, bringing his hand up to rub at his temple. “Did I get hammered or something?” He didn’t like the smirk that blossomed on Mark’s lips.

“You fainted…straight into my arms. You know, if you wanted my attention you didn’t have to go to such extremes,“ the American teased. Jack felt himself go pale again before he blushed a horrible pink, covering his face with his hand as the memory of fainting straight into Mark’s chest resurfaced.

“Jesus fucking Christ,” the Irishman groaned; he turned his head away. “I cannot believe this is happening.”

“Hey…” the American started to say before Jack pushed himself into a sitting position in one swift motion- he regretted it just as quickly, and felt himself being moved so he was leaning back, supported. “Woah, hold on there, Jackyboy,” Mark said,“you have to stay still. You freaked yourself out pretty bad a few minutes ago, so I’m gonna make sure you don’t strain yourself anymore, yeah?”

It took Jack even longer to figure out that he was leaning back against his friend’s chest- his crush’s chest. He shifted and started to protest, feeling more embarrassed than ever before in his life. Mark wouldn’t hear anything else, though, and he wrapped his arms around Jack to keep him from getting up.

“I’m not even kidding, the only thing you need right now is to relax,” the older man insisted. Jack sighed and leaned back gingerly, ears still a bright, bright, crimson. “God, I’m sorry,” the Irishman sighed. “I can’t believe I did this.”

Mark was silent for a long moment. Then, he asked,“Why didn’t you tell us?”

“Tell you what?”

“That you’re afraid of heights.”

Jack couldn’t say what the whole truth was, which was that he wanted to look cool in front of his crush (who just so happened to be Mark) and share a tender moment next to each other, gazing out at the city of Seattle. He chopped it down, though still feeling silly.

“I didn’t want you guys to have to miss anything because of me,” he shrugged. “It’s usually not this bad. Also, do you know how stupid it sounds when you tell someone you’re afraid of heights?”

He could feel the frown in Mark’s tone. “It’s not stupid when you faint because you forced yourself to do something you’re not comfortable with, Jack.”

Jack sighed. “I know. You’re right. I- I just-” He leaned forward, trembled, hid his face in his hands; he was far too embarrassed to do anything else. His head still spun from the event, and his whole body was tense from the terror he was remembering and the sheer humility of it all.

It was Mark’s turn to sigh. “What did I just say? C'mere.” He pulled the younger man back against him. Jack stiffened until he felt fingers running through his hair. Slowly but surely, he melted, allowing himself to fall back into Mark’s embrace and become still. “I told you, you have to relax,” the American reminded him, and Jack felt the deep voice run through him, soothing from the inside out. “You can’t do this to yourself.”

In his jumbled state of mind, Jack admitted,“I just wanted to get you to like me.”

There was a short pause before Mark said,“I do like you!”

“Yeah,” Jack said, tone bitter,“you like me. But not how I want you to.”

Jack shut his mouth. He couldn’t believe himself.

Well, he had had a good run, but his life was now over. He was very much prepared to fling himself off of the top of the Seattle Space Needle after that. What else could that have meant? Nothing but romantic intentions. Shit. Shit. Jack clamped his eyes shut. He was through. Everything was over. Everything was-

Jack’s brain stopped functioning when he felt a tender kiss on his head.

The Irishman turned his head to stare at Mark in disbelief. The American smiled at him, somehow smug and sincere at the same time. “I wish you had told me that a long time ago,” he admitted in Jack’s silence. “We could have been having so much more fun together.”

Jack blinked before he glared into Mark’s dark eyes. “You fucking bastard!” he swore, but a smile took over his face, giving him away.

“Have you guys made out yet or what?” Wade called over from the other side of the observation deck.

Before Mark could answer, Jack pushed their lips together, too eager to wait for things to get awkward. Mark laughed when they parted.

“I think we’re about to!” he teased before he and Jack kissed again.

**Author's Note:**

> Just some fluff to start out my eventual spamming of Septiplier fanfiction on this site. I hope you enjoyed it, and leave a comment if you like! Title comes from the poem by W. Wordsworth.


End file.
